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Hipster Saturation

by Michael Kane

Tom said something distressing as we walked back from Loco Burrito II.

"I've reached hipster saturation," he said.

"I know . . I kind of hear you," I said.  "I wonder if I look like everyone else."

"You do," he answered.

I've been worrying about it lately.  I like to think I have my own style, and I'm certainly not rocker-y, but shit - I wear Adidas, and jeans, and a t-shirt, and I have shaggy hair.  Fuck!  I live in THE neighborhood for hipsters.  I hate the word, too.  The only saving grace is that there's a great joke that features that word.

But shit - do I need a new style?  I hate looking like everyone else.  I don't think I do, and I explained reasons why I thought I looked different, but as I said them they sounded more and more flimsy.  I said, "I don't know . . maybe I'm . . maybe . ." and Tom finished, "Fooling yourself?"

Huh . . I've decided my next motif is "Preppy Gangsta".  Now I need to collect the pieces.

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"Preppy Gangsta sounds hot. The fear of looking like the others is less frightful when you think of how mentally below average most of those idiots are, and prop yourself up on a coolness pedistal. When I'm feeling insecure, I chow down on the fact that I live in China, which regardless of the mediocrity of my job here, makes me think, at least temporarily that I am imensely coolor then anyone who has the same shoes that I do. Oh and I move to the LES before it blew up. I'm not sure if you tell yourself that about your neighborhood too. Seriously, I will swear until my death that I did."

by Kristin Collins