Make  a
Portrait

Tell  a
Story

Start  a
Theme

See
Everyone

Everyone can read and add to this story!

Who

Tom Kane
Adrianna
ALAN K BROWN
Beth Kane
Jerel Slaughter
JoAnne Palmateer
Katey Ryan
Kristin Collins
Lauren Williamson
Maureen Drohan
Melanie M
Michael Kane
Nick Courage
Russell Armand
Sandy Heiler

What

Separate multiple keywords with commas.

or Cancel

When

Date range

to

or Cancel

Where

or Cancel

Of Course You Can Have My Wallet!

by Tom Kane

So I went swimming yesterday and during the measly 15 minutes I had in the pool, someone stole my wallet out of my VERY LOCKED locker. I had the top locker and they went in through the bottom one, pried the divider out and pulled my pants through. Thieves are such bitches.

I was stranded in Manhattan, having just lost the $76 monthly Metrocard I bought to get to the gym, so I had to call Michael to come into the city and bring me some cash. It sucks not having an ATM card, let me tell you. I have only a passport and a checkbook and I feel like it's 1983 and I'm in Europe.

I cancelled everything, then filed a police report. New York's Finest offered this helpful advice: "You should do a better job of securing your possessions." Thanks for understanding, guys.

Today I applied for a replacement driver's license and shopped for a handsome new wallet. I didn't find any, so I bought a velcro one for $1.08. It's purple and has a windsurfer on it. It says "Hawaii," but behind my back it whispers, "Tom's 12 and has bad taste."

I just realized I forgot to cancel my library card. Hope my thief's not a big reader.
Sign in to give feedback!

   

Comments

Sign in to add a comment!
"sucks!!! I lost my wallet once in china...you cannot begin to imagine the difficulties that sent me off in a tailspinning confontation with being completely alone, having not a dime, and not a word to express my situation to anyone. It was in the first month or something that I arrived here...and the thing bounced out of my bike basket. Like a dummy, I put it there, because like a dummy, I didnt take notice to the fact that the openings int he basket were bigger then my wallet which had of course, recently been refueled with a couple hundred bucks...which of course is how much I kept in my wallet at the time, because like a dummy, thats what made sence to me. Also, I was on my way to return a 6 feet under DVD for the THIRD time that night...because it would not work in my dvd player. It was awesome, and I think I almost exploded too."

by Kristin Collins 

"hey your wallet is made in korea...making it worth way more then a buck 8. Plus, you have a rainbow on it. Making it even more awesome...your not 12, your awesome...100% awesome. I am a nerd."

by Kristin Collins 

"You're probably right, Kristin -- I should give myself more credit. I'm at least a teenager. Thanks!"

by Tom Kane 

"So, does this mean that you want a new wallet for Christmas? You haven't received any livestock for a few years."

by Beth Kane 

"What is wrong with people? That's terrible. You just feel violated, right? I think I told you this story, Tom, but maybe not. A little over a year ago, someone broke into the house across the street from us. So, we decided to get an alarm for our house. We placed the ADT signs prominently, at the front door and in front of the gate to the backyard, to deter burglars. We came home from work about a week after putting the signs up, and someone stole the flower pots off the front porch. Flower pots! It was as if to say, "We may not be able to break in, but we'll steal anything you leave outside." At least Nikki backed off her demand to move out of the neighborhood. Fortunately, something good came out of this--an awesome new wallet."

by Jerel Slaughter 

"There's lesbian pride written all over this wallet. It's purple and has a rainbow flag! Glad you're representin'."

by Adrianna 

"Came through the bottom locker? You must have looked rich to make it worth their while! What were you wearing? An obviously surfer-specific swimsuit? There's something awfully suspicious about attracting that kind of action. I'm sorry some jerk got your stuff, though,"

by Sandy Heiler 

"That bites. Just remember, the karma wheel keeps on spinning. I had my wallet stolen once- I left it in a store and the store closed. When I came back and looked through the window after hours, it was still on the counter. Stupidly I wrote a note and said I would be there in the morning to collect it, but by the time I got there (before the store officially opened) the owner of the place had already pocketed my wallet. I called the police, and the officers who came unfortunately played softball with the owners' son, so weren't very helpful in seeing things my way. The owner then counter accused me of trying to extort cash out of them!(Had I been vying for free merchandise, why would I choose a key-cutting place in the mall? I would have gone to the Gap or somewhere more useful!) SO I had to go down to the police station for a few hours and convince them I wasn't the one lying. Horrible. I never did see my wallet again, but I have found a few wallets and a few cel phones since then and I get great joy out of being honest. The store that stole my wallet filed for bankruptcy the next year. Heh heh heh. Your thief will get theirs eventually."

by Melanie M 

"I love the new Hawaii wallet! Sorry about losing your wallet - it is a pain replacing the credit cards and licenses and everything else."

by ALAN K BROWN 

"if i'm in line at the deli, and i hear velcro behind me, i'll look for ya opening your phat wallet"

by Scott Heiferman